Women in Science 2022 – Anna Shabalina

Anna Shabalina, Senior SRF Engineer, ASTeC | STFC

“I am a nuclear physicist turned SRF engineer” says my social media profile and business cards. In practice, I make things happen – that’s my real job. I started my job at STFC in 2021. I am a senior Superconducting Radiofrequency Engineer at Daresbury Lab. I lead the cavity procurement and qualification program for the Proton Improvement Plan II – a new accelerator being built at the Fermi National Accelerator Laboratory (USA) for neutrino discovery research.

I come from a family of engineers, my sister is a physicist, but I never felt smart enough for it. Still, I found every other subject hopelessly boring, and persisted. I was admitted to the Physics Department of The (legendary) Moscow State University in Russia, but still felt too stupid to belong. 

I remember the moment I first heard about the proton structure, the “quark-gluon soup”. I was fascinated, dove deep into the subject, and switched my major from semiconductors to nuclear physics. During my radio physics exam a lecturer brushed his hand over my stomach, said “you don’t need to know this”, and gave me an automatic “pass”. I was glad to be done.

I spent 2 summers at a national lab in the USA working on a particle detector design for my Master’s Thesis. Inspired by a multinational community of intelligent people, I applied for a PhD in experimental nuclear physics there.  A year later I was threading light-shifting fibers through layers of scintillating strips, making a detector for a new experiment, when an old white guy told me, patronisingly, that it’s unfortunate I chose nuclear physics, especially experimental, and if insist on physics, I should have stuck with something more appropriate for a girl – like theory. I didn’t find a good response.

I quit PhD after 2 years and got a job operating a particle accelerator. I worked with scientists and engineers from all over the world, learning everything I could about the “machine” and its components, earning myself a reputation and a place in the field. In my free time I’d often get asked what am I doing in America, did I come to marry? I’d say no, I am a nuclear physicist, an accelerator operator at the lab here. Most often they would look me up and down and say “noooo, really? You’re too pretty.” I didn’t have a good response either.

“Persist. We belong here.”

Anna Shabalina

I remember watching a young woman standing her grounds in a meeting, and I thought she was “a bit intense”. A few years later I was the “intense” one. I realized how biased and blind I was in the past and committed to change.  I worked my way up to an SRF engineer, became an expert in my own right, and led a multi-departmental effort to improve the performance of our accelerator which generated a lot of interest in the community. I was empowered. I also was mistaken for a personal assistant far too often.  

After my invited talk at a big conference a man waited in line to ask about my sparkly heels rather than research, and offered to carry me to the dinner reception. This time I had an answer, but someone else told him to shut up first.

I helped organize a WiSTEM event later that year where we all agreed on the importance of diversity in science. A year later, in between applying for a larger grant that capitalized on my research initiative and supporting the accelerator operations, I found myself fighting to get Personal Protective Equipment in women’s sizes, not extra small men’s. The lead on the grant was handed to a man who did not want it. I led another WiSTEM event in the same year, focusing on the reasons women leave the field. I joined STFC shortly after.

In my new role here I feel heard, respected, equal. I am not a token woman for the pics. I am one of the loudest voices in my team, and I don’t have to defend it or prove my authority. We’ve come a long way, the future is getting brighter. Persist. We belong here.